Entry #11 (Eng 102) - Let the Lesson Continue!

Welcome to the world of blogging...

So here you are at the start of your English class thinking how you totally have this nailed already.  English is easy, you've likely been taking English classes for about 12 years now.  This is totally a breeze, easy A, in the bag!  And then your professor lays out what you'll be doing in your English class.  You can't help but think to yourself, "Wait what?  What did he say?  Did I hear that right?"  And like a needle getting dragged across a vinyl record (for those who even remember those), your thoughts of easy-street promptly derail as you see in the syllabus that, no, you weren't hearing things.  You do in fact have a "blog project" as a major part of your grade.  *Smiles*  It's not as bad as you might think.

So a few things about blogging.  First, it's really not a joke.  It might seem like a joke, you might make fun of it or mock it or really just think it's pointless but it's more important than you might first think.  Blogging is sort of a more relaxed way of helping you to learn how to connect what you're writing to who you're writing it to.  And it does that in a lot of little ways without it becoming this giant, neon sign of blinking arrows pointed at "AUDIENCE" to continually remind you .  It isn't some giant, stinking yeti breathing down your neck each time you write or an ACME hammer being bludgeoned over your head so you never forget about your audience.  It's subtle, it's there but it isn't in your face. 

Yeah, you're going to get tired of hearing this.  Just get used to it now, it will be repeated a lot.  A. Lot.  But that's because it's important.  I'll avoid preaching about it (because again, you'll hear this plenty in class, just wait.) but I'll touch a few points and help explain how blogging has helped with each of these.

So I already touched onto audience because that's a big part of blogging - who you're writing your blog to.  But no matter who you're aiming your writing towards, if WHAT you write is, frankly, crap then no one is going to stick around to keep reading it.  You have to find a way to make your content interesting.  This can be challenging sometimes when it comes to serious topics you might be given to write about, but it's still possible.  Finding ways to break up the monotony of endless words droning on on was something that personally I knew I would have to figure out.  I'm what you'd call.... "summary impaired" so writing small amounts just isn't... ever going to happen.  Ever.  Still, what you have to say is going to lend a lot towards drawing an audience and getting people to think about and respond to what you say.  Of course, keeping things super spiffy with lots of amusing and snort-inducing memes helps too!  Or... just... being clever in some other manner.  The possibilities are limitless.

Now, while who you're talking to and what you're talking about are very, very important, how you say it is just as important.  For me I discovered that I am clearly, clearly a heavily sarcastic person in my more free-form writing.  Sarcasm has it's place, it does, and it's not in everything.  I've had to curb it a lot in our writing projects for class.  Here on my blog though?  I've got a bit more freedom to run amok with my natural sarcasm.  I've loved exploring that too.  While half the posts made on this blog have been on topics given to me to write about, there's still a great deal of freedom in deciding how to write about whatever the topic is.  That's where a lot of creativity comes in and I've thoroughly savored each moment of it.  ....even after getting lost in the sea of memes for hours and realizing I haven't written a single cotton-picking word. 

Don't do this.  Don't.  Avoid it.  Even if posts #7 and #8 aren't due until the week that #9 and #10 are due does not mean that you want to wait and do all four at once.  DO NOT DO THIS!  I speak from a place of experience.  This is a nightmare.  You will hate yourself.  Make yourself do the posts the week they're scheduled or you will regret it.  Procrastination is an evil, evil mistress and she will destroy you without a second thought.  If there is one thing I have learned, one massive piece of advice and guidance I can offer as you start this blogging journey: DO NOT WAIT TO POST!  Especially if you want to do the extra credit posting.  Cause doing 5 posts in one day will make you want to murder people in violent and offensive ways, particularly yourself for having waited till the last minute to do them.  Save yourself the heartache.  Just do them each week they're due.  It's easier.  Trust me...

Even if no one outside of your teacher and classmates are ever going to read what you write down - take pride in your work.  I often imagine that all these people are going to stumble across my blog and I think about how I want them to read what I put down, how I want them to be captivated, to be intrigued, to be amused even.  I think of the ways that I could work to make that random person doing a web search that finds my blog to be interested in continuing reading.  I realize that it's not going to happen, but I always keep that in the back of my mind when I'm writing.  That way, at the very least, those who do read my posts will maybe get a smidgen more enjoyment from the effort I've put into it.

There's such a sense of elation that comes when I see that someone has commented on my blog.  I love the fact that others have read it and enjoyed it and felt in some way connected to what I've said.  It makes all the time spent digging around for graphic content or struggling for what I want to say or how to say it all worth it.  It makes me feel like I've done a good job and I always revel in that, in that ability to reach others, to make that connection.  Ultimately the best piece of advice I can give to anyone who's starting this blogging journey is just be yourself.  Don't be afraid to explore topics, look deeper into things and explore your own voice.  That's what blogging really did the most for me, it helped me to find my own voice, to find my own way of saying things, and to delve deeper into topics I might otherwise have never had the guts to discuss.  So, there's my two cents worth, use them as you will.  This is me, signing off one final time...

Entry # 10 (Eng 102) - The Light at the End of the Tunnel!

ALMOST THERE!

It's almost time!  We're almost there!  It's almost over!  In barely two short, glorious weeks the Fall 2017 semester will be through!  Oh glorious exaltation, I can remember what sleep feels like!

And to be honest, at this point I kind of feel like I even have the same war wounds, just on the inside.  My very soul is shredded, I don't remember what not being stressed feels like.  It's honestly my own fault though.  I'm the genius who started a last minute online spring semester class, went straight into summer semester, split classes so as soon as I was done with two classes I started two more and then a third one.  The third summer course was online and 16 weeks, so that stretched into fall semester and I had 3 classes fall semester.  Basically for the last six months I've done nothing but school and work.  The sad part?  I hadn't even realized that till I started breaking out in hives and tried to figure out "WTF IS GOING ON?!" and my doctor was like "oh, it's stress."  ...really?  Really?  Ugh.

This mindset has become something of a joke with my co-workers:
 
Coworker:"What are you working on?"
Me: "Oh, my English paper, trying to find sources for my History paper, working on blogs, peer reviewing, rethinking the reality of my life and wondering just how insane I really am"
Coworker: "...okay, how are you doing that at the end of a 16 hour work day?"
Me:"I live in a perpetual state of exhaustion and stress.  I survive off of caffeine, willpower and pure spite."
Coworker: *slowly backs away while listening to me giggle like an unhinged woman*

Yeah... so the excitement of "OH MY GOD IT'S ALMOST OVER" sort of wore off with this realization.  Well, that coupled with:

...seriously, if I never write another paper it will be glorious.  I know that won't happen.  Not even close.  But maybe I can manage a few months of no paper writing?  Maybe?  God I hope so, my brain is starting to make some disturbing noises while I stare at Microsoft Word going "What's my topic again?"

<.<  I plead the 5th.  I think this also applies to blog posts.  The hubster was telling me last night:

Hubster: "Okay! I'm going to bed"
Me: "Okay, I'm finishing up my blog posts, just one more due this week!"
Hubster: "That's great!  What's this one on?"
Me: "NO IDEA!"
Hubster: "You were way too happy saying that..."

Okay seriously, the topic for this blog sort of hit me at about 2AM when my brain had officially hit the "Fuck you, I'm done, sleep.  Sleep now.  No you can't keep working, I said I'm done, SLEEP WOMAN!"  ...yes I have arguments with myself, there's nothing wrong with that.  It's only a cause for concern when you start losing the arguments with yourself.  Then you should start to worry.  Probably.  Just sayin'.

Okay, I simply had to include this meme because when I read it I couldn't help but to literally laugh out loud (for a little too long) at the hilariousness of it all.  Granted, I might have found it so funny because there have been a few times working on various papers this semester when I have stared at a word and literally not been able to tell if I had the right tense of it.  Thank God for phone calls to my mom, a retired teacher.  Even if I'm pretty sure she's starting to wonder if I've lost my mind when I can easily spout off "3-dollar words" without hesitation but can't tell if I'm using "toward" correctly.  (Hint: I'm not, for some reason I consistently want to put a freaking "s" on the end of that word.  It's embarrassing.)

I foresee this happening for me, I really do.  I was pretty much like this at the end of my History mid-term, furiously scribbling away as my handwriting became progressively more like chicken-scratch than actual legible writing.  It was so bad I actually apologized to my teacher when I handed it in.  Given the final exam has two more essay questions on it than the mid-term I have a feeling I'm going to have some pretty serious hand cramping issues.  BUT!  At least the final has an hour and 50 minutes allotted take it, instead of the 50 minutes for the mid-term!  Huzzah!

*does a happy dance*

It's almost oooooover!  It's almost oooooover!  I'm seriously not wiggling on my couch while writing this.  I'm not.  Really.  You can't prove a thing!  I'm still trying so, so hard to not utterly freak out though.  Every time I start getting really excited, my brain immediately has to be a total downer and remind me: "Oh, your final English paper is due on Tuesday in class and you work all weekend.  And you haven't started your 12-page research paper for your final History paper that's due Friday."  *Brain proceeds to point and laugh at me*  ...my brain is an asshole.

Ultimately, there are two ways that I see myself leaving my final classes.

Option 1:

And Option 2:

Honestly, I think both are going to be fairly accurate.  So, so close.  It's so close.  I can taste the freedom, I can imagine going to sleep and NOT having to set my alarm and being able to sleep for hours and hours.  Oh such glorious sleep.  How I miss you so much.  It's going to be like getting to see an old friend after months apart, where all you want to do is hug each other and not let go because if you let go, they might go away again.  SLEEEEEP!  Still, it's almost over.  Sure I have a lot of work left and an obscene amount of writing left to do for various papers or assignments, but it's still almost over.  The light is at the end of the tunnel, it's so close.  Just a little longer... and remember: